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Child’s Play Golf Tournament
Posted by News Fetcher on May 28 '12 at 12:45 PM
By Gabe from Penny Arcade:


This is just a heads up that Wednesday is the last day to sign up for our Child’s Play Charity golf tournament. We’ll be playing golf on June 8th at the Angeles National golf course in Sunland Ca. This is actually the Friday after E3 so if you happen to be down there already the course is not too far away.

We still have some spots available. You can check out this site for all the details. We’ll have golf, food, prizes and a bouncy castle. One of those was a lie. You’ll have to come to the tournament to see which one though.

-Gabe out

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Further Disruptions
Posted by News Fetcher on May 28 '12 at 10:30 AM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
John Carmack’s bit about game stories, which are often porn stories, was controversial in the way that true things tend to be. It isn’t always this way, and it doesn’t have to be, but it often is.

Globetrotting military shooters illustrate this maxim fairly well: it might help, next time you are embroiled in one, to assign archetypes like Pizza Boy or Lecherous Mechanic to your various pawns. It’s not meant to be caustic, it’s simply observable. As a generality “good” stories are additive and “extant” stories are expected; it’s possible to lose on that axis but there have to be failures elsewhere. If you’re giving somebody a chance to play in big, dynamic environments with crates full of horizon tech while you incorporate the best thinking about interface the last ten years has to offer, though, well… maybe we can sorta meet in the middle.

I had a conversation two full years ago with 5th Cell’s Jeremiah Slaczka about what indie meant, and it’s something that actually takes some doing. I mean, Valve is “indie.” Right? Except they own the copyright on the digital equivalent of the carbon molecule. I’m not trying to denigrate them, and anyway, it’s not possible to. I’m just saying we might want to figure out what the term means with some kind of granularity: what virtues it supposedly represents.
< article continued at Penny Arcade >

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Further Disruptions
Posted by News Fetcher on May 27 '12 at 11:15 PM
From Penny Arcade:


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Disruptive Technology
Posted by News Fetcher on May 25 '12 at 10:30 AM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
Whenever we come up with something dumb, something that’s supposed to be a joke like the game in the strip, a lot of times it starts to grow on me. I don’t know! I think there’s a lot of headroom there.
I do have a Kickstarter problem, though, and it may require a technology a sophisticated as Gabriel’s to bring this irresistible drive to its conclusion. Part of it is that… yeah. Right? Arimaa is cool, and a beautiful set that honors Arimaa is wanty, that is to say, it generates want.
I think that I could elaborate in a very robust way on my reasoning for backing any specific project; it would run the gamut from “flights of fancy” to “social pressure” to any other damn thing. At a very low level, though, somewhere in my brain’s ineffable primality, I hate it - hate it - when cool ideas, or people who have cool ideas, are unable to realize them because they haven’t collected enough green pieces of paper. That’s the White Trash in me coming out; I’ve talked about him before. Get me mad enough, and you’ll hear him: the way he snaps off a trailing G, the way his teeth make a tongue prison. But that variant has a deep loathing for the undulations of class which serve primarily to strangle the real. I very nearly typed that entire sentence in all caps; there he goes again.

The long and the short of it is that I’ve never has a methodology whereby three clicks can obviate some measure of this fucking stupid-ass crap. Therein lies the danger.

< article continued at Penny Arcade >

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Disruptive Technology
Posted by News Fetcher on May 24 '12 at 11:15 PM
From Penny Arcade:


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The Foxtrot Papa Of Bravo Alpha
Posted by News Fetcher on May 23 '12 at 10:00 AM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
We’d only played about ten minutes of Ghost Recon: Future Soldier when we wrote the comic, but it was enough time for someone to ask me What The Situation Was, and whenever they do that this is always the conversation I hear in my head. It’s ineluctable. I have to say the whole thing out loud, too. If I don’t say it out loud, things begin to thicken up there. I can feel the words forming a clot in my brain.

Splinter Cell: Conviction is one of my favorite games, and I only know a couple people who agree with that assessment. The competitive multiplayer had a different shape than previous games, different enough to horrify longtime proponents of the series: one on one, in an era with a hundred and twenty-six versus a hundred and twenty-six, seems like a failure of imagination. It succeeded, though, by retaining its stealth cache while letting you corral each round’s limited number of targets: either as points to be scored, or as dogs to sic on your opponent.
I don’t know them personally, but there are apparently fans of Conviction on the team of Future Soldier, because the three things that define the last Splinter Cell:

1. A “queued kill” mechanism,

2. Text projections directly into the environment, and

3. The best stealth traversal mechanic in existence

< article continued at Penny Arcade >

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The Foxtrot Papa Of Bravo Alpha
Posted by News Fetcher on May 22 '12 at 11:15 PM
From Penny Arcade:


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Incredulity
Posted by News Fetcher on May 20 '12 at 11:15 PM
From Penny Arcade:


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Push Fight!
Posted by News Fetcher on May 18 '12 at 08:45 AM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
Ben wrote up an article on the game already, which I think you might enjoy. But of my favorite things about it is the incredibly genuine person behind it. Watch this YouTube video, clearly converted from VHS or something, where he teaches you how to play his game.



(CW)TB

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Recycling
Posted by News Fetcher on May 18 '12 at 08:45 AM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
The new paradigm for loot in multiplayer action RPGs has been altered somewhat. Skeletons still explode with cash and prizes, that portion has been rigorously maintained. But the merchandise they drop essentially drops separately for each player, so you never have to worry if you picked up the wrong thing or got somebody’s money or any of these other bookkeeping things (like Inventory Tetris) that used to be considered gameplay.
I don’t mean that in a dismissive way, either. I liked Inventory Tetris! But this Diablo is smooth, smooth edges, smooth, from Health On Contact Globes to its infinitely twiddle-able skills.
Loot is smooth. The old “pinata” model wasn’t truly workable in a public multiplayer environment; it got the job done for me in the past, because I play games of this kind either in absolute monastic solitude or with people I can trust, so if a nice crossbow drops we can make certain such things are properly apportioned. That’s not how it works for the vast swath of humanity. Nobody gets screwed in the new paradigm, which is a top-tier concern. In terms of raw philosophy, we’re no longer playing the same game. Client prediction already muddies those waters, but now we’re talking about something a bit more explicit. Downing a boss and divvying up its hoard in WoW, with its rolls and attendant nail biting, is something I’d love to see performed in special cases here. I fully recognize that I am the only one who gives a shit.
< article continued at Penny Arcade >

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Recycling
Posted by News Fetcher on May 17 '12 at 11:15 PM
From Penny Arcade:


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Bungie Photoset at PAR
Posted by News Fetcher on May 17 '12 at 01:00 PM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
One of the things we wanted to to do with The Penny Arcade Report was to accompany it with an expressive visual aspect, and to that end we secured the services of Dabe Alan. We knew about him from his excellent resume, already: he applied for Erika’s job, back in the day. I think he does great work in general, but I want to praise him specifically for the pictures he took at Bungie. Seriously, just shit hot.

(CW)TB

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Betwixt
Posted by News Fetcher on May 16 '12 at 10:00 AM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
This was a goofy joke when we wrote it at eleven or so yesterday morning, though it became less hilarious as the day progressed. During “normal hours,” the failure of Blizzard to recall that Diablo is a popular game was a boon: I have my own shit to write. But later, when I began to prowl for leisure activities, and it occurred to me that I might utilize the sixty dollars of congealed entertainment I had recently purchased, I was not able to. And then I was, and then I wasn’t, and then no wait it’s still okay now it’s back. Requiring that players be online is one thing - but we are! We’re online right now! They’re the ones who aren’t online. Who watches the watchmen?!?!

Reading around, it’s clear that one needs to phrase their dissatisfaction in these matters in a very specific way. This is one of the stranger new Universals, by which I mean things All Right-Thinking People Believe; things like China Miéville Is An Enjoyable Read. Before you can say that you’re unhappy about something you bought not working, you have to make the parenthetical case that you’re above the whole fray, and it can work or not work, it’s all so droll; you can’t imply that any of it matters because that would mean you weren’t concerned with matters of global import.
I should take care not attend the same potlucks as these people. The kind of family I have would eat them; I think that they would actually cook them and eat them, because these people have not done enough to distinguish themselves from food.
< article continued at Penny Arcade >

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Betwixt
Posted by News Fetcher on May 15 '12 at 11:15 PM
From Penny Arcade:


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An Edit To The Above Post
Posted by News Fetcher on May 14 '12 at 01:15 PM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
In place of the word Anathem - which is the actual name of a book by Neal Stephenson - I inadvertently typed Anathema, a word that means “someone or something intensely disliked or loathed.”

We regret the error.

(CW)TB

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The Verge
Posted by News Fetcher on May 14 '12 at 10:15 AM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
Neal Stephenson was my favorite author for a very long time, and The Diamond Age remains my favorite book, even if I can’t read any if his newer books with an approximation of enjoyment.
I should emphasize that when I say “newer books,” some of these books are by now quite old: I loved the original Cryptonomicon, but every book past that has been torment. I choked down Anathema from about the half-way point, jaw set, lower teeth pressed hard against the upper, determined not to be defeated. He’d already gotten my money, but I was determined not to lose my honor.
The difference between Neal Stephenson and China Miéville for me is that I never liked the latter, even though I’m supposed to; even though it is simply an accepted fact that people of any cognition whatsoever are turning each page with a shaking hand, ready to receive his next sacred revelation. I own every one of his books, each time thinking this will be the one until his unique ocular drill begins to whir and I must hurl the book across the room or be blinded. This may be the first time you have read on a website that China Miéville is something less than a God; I’ve certainly never seen it typed, which was reason enough to do it.
< article continued at Penny Arcade >

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The Verge
Posted by News Fetcher on May 13 '12 at 11:15 PM
From Penny Arcade:


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PAX Dev Returns
Posted by News Fetcher on May 11 '12 at 01:15 PM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
It’s back, and everything you could possibly want to know (including how to submit panels) can be found at the official site.

(CW)TB

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The Warrior Spirit
Posted by News Fetcher on May 11 '12 at 09:45 AM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
Gabriel and and frequent collaborator Scott Kurtz were talking about how Draw Something barely meets the criteria for a game. Gabriel is not as good at Pictionary as you might think: he can draw, certainly, but when you apply a time pressure his whole shit falls apart. Drawing Quickly is a very particular skill, one you must choose at the time of character creation, and he took the traits “Abrasive” and “Annoyingly High Metabolism” instead.
If you can truly draw, though, and you have a capacitive stylus because you are a professional artist, and there are no limits on the amount of time you can sit there and draw, they’re right: the game disappears. The inability of most people to draw a recognizable concept quickly is the game. Right? If you look at a duck, and then correctly declare that it is one, that’s not exactly top ten good times.
While he was still a daily player, the only real complaint he had was that he found himself pulling up the same words over and over. More words, even sponsored words or words which represent common brands, were not something he found especially unwelcome but he may be in the minority there. People are pulling out of the game, some say for this reason, but if I regularly reached nine million people I’d probably say that I was doin’ prett-ty good.
This is that dang ol’ tendency to bifurcate the real into some binary proposition, play or not play, when there’s clearly at least one more approach: leverage their infrastructure to make a statement about it in your turn itself. Stepping out of the dialogue is that choice which seems courageous, but is not; the answer now, as ever, is always more art. Raise a sword in the Devil’s House. Even the answer to art you don’t like is more art - in fact, especially then.
< article continued at Penny Arcade >

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The Warrior Spirit
Posted by News Fetcher on May 10 '12 at 11:15 PM
From Penny Arcade:


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