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Please Tell Me You Know
Posted by News Fetcher on October 16 '11 at 11:15 PM
From Penny Arcade:


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Maybe Not Every Toy
Posted by News Fetcher on October 14 '11 at 10:30 AM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
Here is the strip.

We were at GDC for something or other a few years ago, and the same dude kept winning awards - over, and over, and over. It was approaching comical levels, and the affection from the throng increased with each distinct victory, until he very nearly broke down. He started to talk about what was possible where games and people intersect, and then light started to shoot out of him. I couldn’t believe his energy - it wasn’t pure optimism, with its hint of naivete. It was something more like… faith. He is Andy Schatz of Pocketwatch Games, and he has the floor.

OK, so Tycho asked me to write a post for him a few days ago. “When do you need it?” “Uh, how about Wednesday.” So yeah, this is what you get when you ask for my finest prose with a two day deadline. Something that sounds like Jesse Pinkman writing on your facebook wall, yo.

Anyways, you may not know me, that’s because I’m one of those indie dudes that made a game that won the IGF in 2010 THAT STILL ISN’T OUT YET (Monaco must be the hipster game of the decade: “Oh, you haven’t played Monaco yet? You must be a Skyrim fan.”)

What kind of asshole enters his game in the IGF before it’s done and then decides to delay release for 2 years?



->This kind of asshole<-


And now I’m facing the twin demons of high expectations and wrathful impatience.

< article continued at Penny Arcade >

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Maybe Not Every Toy
Posted by News Fetcher on October 13 '11 at 11:15 PM
From Penny Arcade:


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The Line
Posted by News Fetcher on October 12 '11 at 09:45 AM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
The strip is here. We like it. But you also might need it for… something else.

Meet Elonka Dunin. Longtime game developer at Simutronics Corp, creator of GemStone, DragonRealms, CyberStrike (“Game Of The Year!”), Facebook’s Fantasy University, and HeroEngine (which powers Bioware’s Star Wars: The Old Republic). Simutronics’ newest game just hit the App Store - Tiny Heroes, which I can easily recommend. I met Elonka at a booksigning in St. Louis, where she gave me a copy of her Mammoth Book of Secret Codes and Cryptograms. She’s a world expert on unsolved codes, such as the Kryptos sculpture at the center of CIA Headquarters; and helped author Dan Brown with code research for his latest novel, The Lost Symbol, to the point where he inserted a character in the book which is an anagram of her own name. We mail on occasion, and she’s such a specific combination of interesting skills I wanted to ask her a question: When did you know your brain worked differently from other people?


Ahem. My, er, brain? Seems to be about the same size and shape as most other humans of my demographic. I do get a lot of questions about how I got into crypto though, so here’s the best I can offer.

(Oh yeah, gotta start with this: 28-1 10-2 10-3 6-4 18-4 43-1 36-3 9-2 43-4 32-9 41-2 1-1 2-1 45-1 42-3 33-2 3-4)

< article continued at Penny Arcade >

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The Line
Posted by News Fetcher on October 12 '11 at 09:45 AM
From Penny Arcade:


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Demographic Mismatch, Part Two
Posted by News Fetcher on October 09 '11 at 11:15 PM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
New strip’s here. Part One of James’ PAX story is here. Part Two begins… now!

That’s why, at 2:55 PM on Saturday, August 27th, I was more nervous than I’d ever been in my whole life. With a big crowd behind us, cameras rolling, Michelle and I started a new game of Charlie Murder. I brought up the debug menu. My head was spinning. I started overthinking the process of launching the level. The intro scene played some death metal. Is the music going to keep going like this? I thought, death metal is not appropriate proposal music—oh right, it’ll stop. I made sure it stops. Just click the button! I’d done it a hundred times before; this was quite possibly the most meticulously tested sliver of gaming at PAX this year.



The camera panned over. “It’s a Murderfly,” said Michelle. Murderflies are special to us. We hatched the idea of a butterfly with a giant knife at PAX 2009 when we met, then we went on to make our own versions of what a Murderfly should look like. Mine became a boss in The Dishwasher: Vampire Smile and hers adorns the coffee mug on my desk right now. I remade both versions for Charlie Murder; they’re part of the in-game crowd that watches in-game us. There are also a bunch of characters she drew for Charlie Murder and a cameo from the heroes of Vampire Smile. I realized that I was in tears.

In-game me dropped to one knee and pulled out a ring. Real life me, thankful for the cue, dropped to a knee. We were both in tears then. I told her I was so in love with her. “Michelle, will you marry me?” I asked.

She nodded furiously, “Yes!” She was insanely beautiful.

< article continued at Penny Arcade >

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Demographic Mismatch, Part One
Posted by News Fetcher on October 06 '11 at 11:15 PM
From Penny Arcade:


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Demographic Mismatch, Part One
Posted by News Fetcher on October 06 '11 at 11:15 PM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
Here’s the strip: I mean, here. <- It's there.

Meet James Silva. Creator of Dishwasher Samurai, its sequel, “I Made a Game with Zombies in It!,” and the upcoming Charlie Murder, he is a man who keeps it perpetually real. I heard a story about him at PAX, and it ended up being a true story. I asked him to write it up for the site, and he did: in two parts. Here is the first.


Three o’clock on the Saturday of PAX Prime 2011 seemed like the perfect time to pop the question. However, that day at 2:55 PM, with an extremely conspicuous crowd milling about awkwardly in front of our booth, abject terror set in.

“Come on, man, you can do this,” said Mike Wilford, putting a hand on my shoulder. Evidently, I was shaking. Are ring boxes supposed to fit in jeans? I tried to be cool.

“Okay,” I think I said. In reality, it probably came out like, “Um.” I walked over to Michelle. She was beautiful. She’s always beautiful. I tried to say, “Hi,” but it definitely came out as, “Hu-HAAAA!” Would she come over and let me show her something? I asked, in this special new form of English that I’d just invented. I led her to a demo station where we were showing off Charlie Murder. The conspicuous crowd turned, watched, and pulled out their cell phones in unison.



Want to hear how it started? If you don’t, you can always skip to the end. I think it’s a cool story. And it’s all about games.

< article continued at Penny Arcade >

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Humble Indie Bundle
Posted by News Fetcher on October 05 '11 at 01:45 PM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
I already own Frozen Synapse, but I could gift it; I really wanted Trauma, which I saw at GDC a few years ago but it never seemed to come out. Now they’ve gone and thrown in SpaceChem, and it’s over. It’s over! You beat me.

(CW)TB

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No Mouth Disease
Posted by News Fetcher on October 04 '11 at 11:15 PM
From Penny Arcade:


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No Mouth Disease
Posted by News Fetcher on October 04 '11 at 11:15 PM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
We try to take a vacation of some kind after PAX, when we can, and now that an entire month of preparation has passed we’re entering into the realm where such things are feasible. Where are we going? We have two strips that will detail the journey with frightful specificity, and the first of them goes up on Friday. In addition, as sometimes occurs, I have secured the services of an elite cadre to manage the newspost - beings whose unique character and experience are calibrated to nourish you in my absence.
That’s the intention! That’s the intention. I never really know what to do with myself on vacation. I’m one of those people who always feels like they’re doing something wrong if they relax, something dangerous, as though some omnipresent leopard were waiting for my guard to slip. Maybe there is a fucking leopard. There’s gonna be a leopard packed into the overhead bin, and he’s gonna expand in mid-air like one of those canned snakes.
Let’s talk about something else.

We are (I think it is fair to say) flabbergasted by the technology in Rage. I’d use a more workaday word if I thought it could capture the sheer boogita-woogita, jowls flapping in slow motion nature of even the first few minutes above ground. An id game without robust configuration, or even what we might call configuration of any kind, was a real surprise - to alleviate tearing, Gabriel had to force vsync in the driver itself. Still flabbergasted, even without discrete sliders for Flabber and Gast.

I do wonder if we’re done with silent protagonists, though. id games are always feel a bit retro everywhere but the renderer, and almost immediately you’re presented with a scenario that affects the “solidity” of a world that is, in every other way, real. They’ve taken great pains to make it so, which is what makes this so strange.

< article continued at Penny Arcade >

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No Mouth Disease
Posted by News Fetcher on October 04 '11 at 09:45 PM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
We try to take a vacation of some kind after PAX, when we can, and now that an entire month of preparation has passed we’re entering into the realm where such things are feasible. Where are we going? We have two strips that will detail the journey with frightful specificity, and the first of them goes up on Friday. In addition, as sometimes occurs, I have secured the services of an elite cadre to manage the newspost - beings whose unique character and experience are calibrated to nourish you in my absence.
That’s the intention! That’s the intention. I never really know what to do with myself on vacation. I’m one of those people who always feels like they’re doing something wrong if they relax, something dangerous, as though some omnipresent leopard were waiting for my guard to slip. Maybe there is a fucking leopard. There’s gonna be a leopard packed into the overhead bin, and he’s gonna expand in mid air like one of those canned snakes.
Let’s talk about something else.

We are (I think it is fair to say) flabbergasted by the technology in Rage. I’d use a more workaday word if I thought it could capture the sheer boogita-woogita, jowls flapping in slow motion nature of even the first few minutes above ground. An id game without robust configuration, or even what we might call configuration of any kind, was a real surprise - to alleviate tearing, Gabriel had to force vsync in the driver itself. Still flabbergasted, even without discrete sliders for Flabber and Gast.

I do wonder if we’re done with silent protagonists, though. id games are always feel a bit retro everywhere but the renderer, and almost immediately you’re presented with a scenario that affects the “solidity” of a world that is, in every other way, real. They’ve taken great pains to make it so, which is what makes this so strange.

< article continued at Penny Arcade >

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The Affwiction
Posted by News Fetcher on October 03 '11 at 09:45 AM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
Given the disrespectful manner of my treatment, my husk is holding up super well! I hate it, and I hate the idea of it, it’s my enemy in addition to being a kind of prison, but aside from the occasional twinge of piercing, mysterious pain, this thing just keeps on going. Sure: there are the occasional parasitic lumps, sucking out my vitamins. But it’s mostly cool. My teeth are rarely pulled out by a Charleston Chew.
Gabriel’s body is always resentful of their arrangement - always quick to dispense abuse. Sometimes, when we are in an airplane, one side of his face becomes paralyzed. Sometimes his jaw will squeeze a nerve in the side of his head, and even though the worst pain he knows is eating part of his skull, we have a panel to do and he must approximate humanity for the next hour and a half.
Sometimes he will try to eat a piece of fresh, ripe fruit, because we are fucking omnivores, and we respond at a fundamental level to everything that fruit represents. It is at this point that his lips become plump, hideously so, like some Hollywood cautionary tale. This causes him to spend an evening cross referencing symptoms, pacing the skeins of an infernal Web, until he is able to craft himself an entirely custom apocalypse.
I’ve managed to tuck several hours into Dark Souls, the multiplatform followup to the Sony published/From developed grindhouse RPG grudgefuck. You’ll be entirely at home coming over from Demon’s Souls, if you were one of the people exposed to one of the greatest surprises of this console generation.
< article continued at Penny Arcade >

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The Affwiction
Posted by News Fetcher on October 02 '11 at 11:15 PM
From Penny Arcade:


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League of Legends for Child’s Play
Posted by News Fetcher on September 30 '11 at 02:30 PM
By Gabe from Penny Arcade:
We will be playing League of Legends tonight. That’s pretty much what we do every night but tonight is special. Tonight we will be playing for Child’s Play along with some folks from Riot and the 10 Win Streak crew. You can hit up this site tonight at 9:00 PST to watch a live stream of the games. That’s right, You’ll be able to watch Tycho and I along with some other PA people get our asses handed to us by the jerks who made the fucking game.

Seriously though this is a fun site. The 10 Win Streak crew attempts to do just that. Their goal is to win ten games in a row with a given champion. You can watch all their games and donate to Child’s Play on their site.

-Gabe Out

-Gabe out

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Gamer Crest
Posted by News Fetcher on September 30 '11 at 01:30 PM
By Gabe from Penny Arcade:
I think Erika has really outdone herself with this latest deign The Gamer Crest is available in Mens and Ladies. So you can get one if you are a man or a lady.



-Gabe out

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Warehouse Sale
Posted by News Fetcher on September 30 '11 at 01:30 PM
By Gabe from Penny Arcade:
Some stores tell you that they “have a warehouse, nut they don’t make you shop in it.” Well we have a warehouse and we do make you shop in it. We are opening the doors on October 22nd and slashing prices! Tycho and I will be there along with most of the PA crew. We will have big discounts as well as some out of print and hard to get stuff.

It’s not a very big location so we are asking people to sign up for a time slot if you want to come down and shop. You can find all the details and reserve a slot right here.

-Gabe out

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Probably Not
Posted by News Fetcher on September 30 '11 at 09:15 AM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
You’ll need some basic information to get the most out of the strip; I won’t even link it yet. The main thing you need to do is to get your mitts on the demo for Burnout Crash. Get it right away. Oh, you’ve already played it? You’re licensed for strip viewing. If not, you need to go get it. You need to play Rush Hour.
And you need to familiarize yourself with Dr. Beat.
You may find that you have become obsessed with Dr. Beat. You may find yourself wondering if he is a medical doctor or if his doctorate is in beats themselves. His distinctive, infectious intro music generates instant rapport, builds his personal brand, to the degree that the Rush Hour game type is boiled down to these brief, often explosive visits.
In Burnout Crash, you blow up your car to blow up other cars in an attempt to create barriers out of the wreckage. Each mode has a few philosophical distinctions, but Rush Hour is about not letting cars escape. When five cars have gotten through your gauntlet of shredded sedan, you lose - unless Dr. Beat can navigate through the same gauntlet. It’s an inversion of the usual goal, and it’s fun, because while the game’s ordinary drivers will swerve up on the curb, perform a “Brodie,” twist all out and get buck to avoid your shit, Dr. Beat makes almost no effort. Dr. Beat doesn’t give shit, and his vehicle’s intense flammability coupled with a pervasive ennui means that more often than not your “savior” is just the topmost body on a growing pile.
< article continued at Penny Arcade >

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Probably Not
Posted by News Fetcher on September 30 '11 at 01:15 AM
From Penny Arcade:


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Try Our Decrepit Foot-Rags
Posted by News Fetcher on September 28 '11 at 10:15 AM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
The reason the electrified parts of the world have not ground to halt altogether is that the Diablo III beta includes only subset of a percentage of a portion of a slice of a morsel of the first part of the game. Well, we have been there, we have done that. And we’ve gotten the boots.

I talked about the “spirit” having gone out of the plastic when it came to youth fetishes; and it’s like that with Starcraft II for me. I’m not saying it isn’t good, I know it’s good. I simply know it too well. How can a game come out ten years later, which seems like a long time, and ultimately make me feel exhausted? I know where the problem is, believe me. I love watching other people play it. But whatever receptors I had for it are gone.
I came into the beta of Diablo III with a sizable chip placed squarely on my shoulder, a chip of substance, very nearly a pauldron. The reality is that Runic games makes a twenty dollar version of the Diablo series with grace and expertise that satisfies the starving gecko in my brain which longs to click. I played the sequel at PAX, and it’s incredible; I would buy the game for the idle animation on the female Berserker alone. You see “tough” barbarian-types, you see “crazy” ones, there’s a pronounced “noble” strain - but you don’t see wild, for some reason, which I thought was the point. Her eyes are rolling around in her head like marbles. I’ve never seen the like.
< article continued at Penny Arcade >

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