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Father’s Day!
Posted by News Fetcher on June 04 '12 at 11:00 AM
By Gabe from Penny Arcade:
Father’s day is on June 17th! Don’t worry though, if Dad happens to be a PA fan we’ve got you covered. We’ve packed our store with a bunch of cool shit for Dads.

First up is a really cool set of designs from Erika. She put together these awesome Player One, Player Two combos. You can get it as an adult shirt with a Onesie for those of you with the little gamers to be.



Or you can grab an adult and a youth shirt for you and your gamer in training.



We’ve also got some great new First Party items that would be perfect for Dad.



If you’re looking for a classic gift you can go with one of our new First Party ties.

The Penny Arcade deckbuilding game was a huge hit. So much so that the expansion “Rumble in R’Lyeh is already out! This is an expansion but you can also play it as a stand-alone game.

-Gabe out

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Southern Exposure
Posted by News Fetcher on June 04 '12 at 11:00 AM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
I haven’t “missed” E3 until this year. I went every year from ‘99 or so until it collapsed, and the last few years I’ve been fine; I have larvae at home which are molting constantly, and sometimes they need help writhing out of their dessicated sheaths. They need my mandibles. But it was nice to have an excuse to make full use of portables, a chance to leverage all those multiplayer features that were purchased but so rarely utilized.
We’re in the Old Growth stage now for these machines, and there’s a lot of entrenchment, but it’s a time where little green shoots sometimes erupt to startle deliciously. I am keeping a watchful eye; Ben is there as well for The Report, under strict orders to act as our black cloud of surveillance crows.

< article continued at Penny Arcade >

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Southern Exposure
Posted by News Fetcher on June 03 '12 at 11:15 PM
From Penny Arcade:


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Turnaround
Posted by News Fetcher on June 01 '12 at 08:45 AM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
I saw a single still used to promote a Hitman: Absolution trailer, a phalanx of leather-clad Battle-Nuns, and decided to skip it. I felt like I had probably seen something very similar at some point. But being mad at it is apparently a thing, a compulsory thing. But I don’t do compulsory, and I also don’t do infantilizing chivalry. So I don’t do well at these kinds of parties.
The cinematic ambitions of the Hitman games have always been prominently displayed on (or very near to) its sleeve; I watched the video to see what the deal was, and they’re playing around with their subtitle in a pulpy, grindhouse vein. Robert Rodriguez through and through. It’s fight choreography, and it may set an “erotic” stage but it quickly - and I mean quickly - gives way to a gruesome, life or death, septum obliterating struggle that might be hot for somebody but I suspect that’s a very specific demographic. Only a necrophile could be titillated by something like this; by the end, it literally defies the viewer to maintain an erection. As spank material, it leaves something to be desired; specifically, spank material.
I think that once a nun produces an RPG from her habit, we have passed through a kind of “veil” critically speaking. We can certainly talk about it for a long time if you want to. But she did pull out a rocket launcher, seriously just right out of there. It came out. And then people still wanted to talk about this as though it were some kind of haunted obelisk around which an entire medium whirls.

< article continued at Penny Arcade >

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Turnaround
Posted by News Fetcher on May 31 '12 at 11:15 PM
From Penny Arcade:


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Humble Bundle V = Holy Shit
Posted by News Fetcher on May 31 '12 at 11:15 AM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
These last couple bundles have been fucking crazy, but this one is just balls out. Amnesia, AND Psychonauts, AND Limbo, AND Sword & Sworcery, and Bastion if you pay over the average? It does not compute.

(CW)TB

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Pitchin’
Posted by News Fetcher on May 30 '12 at 10:30 AM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
Have you ever seen <a hrtef="http://www.artandcopyfilm.com/">Art & Copy</a>? It’s by the rad guy who did Scratch and a bunch of other awesome shit. It’s a documentary which is about Advertising, which is to say that it is about Mercenary Communication, which people have varying opinions about. My feeling is that once we are aware of its ubiquity, we may study it with greater safety; loss of containment is always a concern, but I find these weaponized memes fascinating beyond belief.
The Pitch is an AMC show which transforms that documentary’s texture into a competition-style program. Having a better product is, as ever, a portion of the whole; competing in such an environment involves telling a better “story” than your opponent. The metadata, though - the stories these companies tell themselves, about themselves - is incadescent. I can’t look away.
I get pretty tantalized by all this talk of Dead Space 3 Co-Op.
< article continued at Penny Arcade >

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Pitchin’
Posted by News Fetcher on May 29 '12 at 11:15 PM
From Penny Arcade:


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The Reubens
Posted by News Fetcher on May 29 '12 at 01:15 PM
By Gabe from Penny Arcade:
This past weekend we attended the Reubens down in Las Vegas. Tycho could not make it but I went down with Robert and our ladies to see what it was all about. On Friday the girls hung out on the strip while Robert and I went to check out the panels. The first one we walked into was something like “how I got two million dollars in free advertising!” Robert and I sat down and almost immediately we were uncomfortable. I’m not going to say the guy’s name because the entire focus of his talk was how he is able to get free publicity all over the place. I’d rather not give him anymore since I think he is a shameless monster. He showed some videos of himself on various local morning news shows circa 1989 and explained that you should always be trying to tie yourself to local news events in order to get on tv. He told us all a story about how “excited” he was when Elizabeth Taylor died because his wife’s family had some photos of the actress as a young girl. He ran to the papers with these on the day she died and used them to promote his animation business. It was at this point that Robert and I stood up and walked out.

We took Gary Tyrrell of Fleen along with us as he had also had enough and we hit the casino. After a few hands of Pai Gow we returned for the panel with Dave Kellett about cartooning in the 21st century. I was disappointed to see that Dave was not alone on the panel. He was up there with two other guys who I had never heard of. I was told the plan was that each of them would speak for ten minutes and then open it up for questions. This is not what happened. Instead the first guy told us his life story for about twenty minutes, then the next guy was boring for ten and finally Dave had to rush through his bit about how webcomics actually work. The first panel I attended was disgusting but this one was just sad.

< article continued at Penny Arcade >

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Child’s Play Golf Tournament
Posted by News Fetcher on May 28 '12 at 12:45 PM
By Gabe from Penny Arcade:


This is just a heads up that Wednesday is the last day to sign up for our Child’s Play Charity golf tournament. We’ll be playing golf on June 8th at the Angeles National golf course in Sunland Ca. This is actually the Friday after E3 so if you happen to be down there already the course is not too far away.

We still have some spots available. You can check out this site for all the details. We’ll have golf, food, prizes and a bouncy castle. One of those was a lie. You’ll have to come to the tournament to see which one though.

-Gabe out

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Further Disruptions
Posted by News Fetcher on May 28 '12 at 10:30 AM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
John Carmack’s bit about game stories, which are often porn stories, was controversial in the way that true things tend to be. It isn’t always this way, and it doesn’t have to be, but it often is.

Globetrotting military shooters illustrate this maxim fairly well: it might help, next time you are embroiled in one, to assign archetypes like Pizza Boy or Lecherous Mechanic to your various pawns. It’s not meant to be caustic, it’s simply observable. As a generality “good” stories are additive and “extant” stories are expected; it’s possible to lose on that axis but there have to be failures elsewhere. If you’re giving somebody a chance to play in big, dynamic environments with crates full of horizon tech while you incorporate the best thinking about interface the last ten years has to offer, though, well… maybe we can sorta meet in the middle.

I had a conversation two full years ago with 5th Cell’s Jeremiah Slaczka about what indie meant, and it’s something that actually takes some doing. I mean, Valve is “indie.” Right? Except they own the copyright on the digital equivalent of the carbon molecule. I’m not trying to denigrate them, and anyway, it’s not possible to. I’m just saying we might want to figure out what the term means with some kind of granularity: what virtues it supposedly represents.
< article continued at Penny Arcade >

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Further Disruptions
Posted by News Fetcher on May 27 '12 at 11:15 PM
From Penny Arcade:


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Disruptive Technology
Posted by News Fetcher on May 25 '12 at 10:30 AM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
Whenever we come up with something dumb, something that’s supposed to be a joke like the game in the strip, a lot of times it starts to grow on me. I don’t know! I think there’s a lot of headroom there.
I do have a Kickstarter problem, though, and it may require a technology a sophisticated as Gabriel’s to bring this irresistible drive to its conclusion. Part of it is that… yeah. Right? Arimaa is cool, and a beautiful set that honors Arimaa is wanty, that is to say, it generates want.
I think that I could elaborate in a very robust way on my reasoning for backing any specific project; it would run the gamut from “flights of fancy” to “social pressure” to any other damn thing. At a very low level, though, somewhere in my brain’s ineffable primality, I hate it - hate it - when cool ideas, or people who have cool ideas, are unable to realize them because they haven’t collected enough green pieces of paper. That’s the White Trash in me coming out; I’ve talked about him before. Get me mad enough, and you’ll hear him: the way he snaps off a trailing G, the way his teeth make a tongue prison. But that variant has a deep loathing for the undulations of class which serve primarily to strangle the real. I very nearly typed that entire sentence in all caps; there he goes again.

The long and the short of it is that I’ve never has a methodology whereby three clicks can obviate some measure of this fucking stupid-ass crap. Therein lies the danger.

< article continued at Penny Arcade >

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Disruptive Technology
Posted by News Fetcher on May 24 '12 at 11:15 PM
From Penny Arcade:


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The Foxtrot Papa Of Bravo Alpha
Posted by News Fetcher on May 23 '12 at 10:00 AM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
We’d only played about ten minutes of Ghost Recon: Future Soldier when we wrote the comic, but it was enough time for someone to ask me What The Situation Was, and whenever they do that this is always the conversation I hear in my head. It’s ineluctable. I have to say the whole thing out loud, too. If I don’t say it out loud, things begin to thicken up there. I can feel the words forming a clot in my brain.

Splinter Cell: Conviction is one of my favorite games, and I only know a couple people who agree with that assessment. The competitive multiplayer had a different shape than previous games, different enough to horrify longtime proponents of the series: one on one, in an era with a hundred and twenty-six versus a hundred and twenty-six, seems like a failure of imagination. It succeeded, though, by retaining its stealth cache while letting you corral each round’s limited number of targets: either as points to be scored, or as dogs to sic on your opponent.
I don’t know them personally, but there are apparently fans of Conviction on the team of Future Soldier, because the three things that define the last Splinter Cell:

1. A “queued kill” mechanism,

2. Text projections directly into the environment, and

3. The best stealth traversal mechanic in existence

< article continued at Penny Arcade >

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The Foxtrot Papa Of Bravo Alpha
Posted by News Fetcher on May 22 '12 at 11:15 PM
From Penny Arcade:


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Incredulity
Posted by News Fetcher on May 20 '12 at 11:15 PM
From Penny Arcade:


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Push Fight!
Posted by News Fetcher on May 18 '12 at 08:45 AM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
Ben wrote up an article on the game already, which I think you might enjoy. But of my favorite things about it is the incredibly genuine person behind it. Watch this YouTube video, clearly converted from VHS or something, where he teaches you how to play his game.



(CW)TB

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Recycling
Posted by News Fetcher on May 18 '12 at 08:45 AM
By Tycho from Penny Arcade:
The new paradigm for loot in multiplayer action RPGs has been altered somewhat. Skeletons still explode with cash and prizes, that portion has been rigorously maintained. But the merchandise they drop essentially drops separately for each player, so you never have to worry if you picked up the wrong thing or got somebody’s money or any of these other bookkeeping things (like Inventory Tetris) that used to be considered gameplay.
I don’t mean that in a dismissive way, either. I liked Inventory Tetris! But this Diablo is smooth, smooth edges, smooth, from Health On Contact Globes to its infinitely twiddle-able skills.
Loot is smooth. The old “pinata” model wasn’t truly workable in a public multiplayer environment; it got the job done for me in the past, because I play games of this kind either in absolute monastic solitude or with people I can trust, so if a nice crossbow drops we can make certain such things are properly apportioned. That’s not how it works for the vast swath of humanity. Nobody gets screwed in the new paradigm, which is a top-tier concern. In terms of raw philosophy, we’re no longer playing the same game. Client prediction already muddies those waters, but now we’re talking about something a bit more explicit. Downing a boss and divvying up its hoard in WoW, with its rolls and attendant nail biting, is something I’d love to see performed in special cases here. I fully recognize that I am the only one who gives a shit.
< article continued at Penny Arcade >

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Recycling
Posted by News Fetcher on May 17 '12 at 11:15 PM
From Penny Arcade:


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